I sit listening to the album Rumors, by Fleetwood Mac and contemplating what it means, for me, to be “gypsy” and how I came to some new epiphanies. Which are always good. Not always easy, but good. We grow when we have them and, hopefully, become wiser. I love this album, wish I could listen to it on vinyl again. The song Gypsy caught my attention. I listened to it a few times, and read the lyrics over and again. Its as if the song was written for me, it holds so true in so many aspects.
I have recently had the self discovery that I am now entering a new phase in my life. I’ve noticed my taste’s in things are beginning to change, my beliefs have been challenged and either held through or changed according to new discoveries and truths, of course I’m physically older, but also I find I have matured both emotionally and intellectually. When ever we come to a cross roads in life, when we move into a new “phase”, it is common, and appropriate to look back and contemplate the changes. Now is the time to decide what still fits and what doesn’t, and leave behind what doesn’t work, so better things can come. And so they should, its well deserved.
I was often a different child growing up, eccentric and a loner usually with just a few friends. I was quite happy that way for the most part, because I was lucky enough to have various animals in my life, most notably horses and cats, but also dogs and other creatures. And I was so blessed to have had some really amazing people around me, encouraging me to be myself and to explore the world. I was then, and always will be, a free thinker. An open spirit. I embrace experience, passion, creativity and knowledge. Part of that gypsy spirit thrives on change. Adventure. Travel. Being out and a part of the world. Just like a fish needs water…
I most certainly sewed my oats at that young age, but thats not what is important. What is important was the choices that I made and the sacrifices along with those choices. No matter how would I have walked my path, there is always a price to pay, good and bad.
I made the choice to be a mother, to have a family. I will never regret this choice, because it was the right choice for me. I did however also choose to give up my gypsy spirit, to conform, to find a center that “society” thought was appropriate for a young stay at home mother. I have many stories to tell of this time, this phase of my life. Its been a long interesting road, and it mostly certainly is not over, but, like this moon, it will continue to regenerate and grow and rest to do it all over again.
One of the greatest lessons I have learned, is that I can embrace my gypsy self and still be a good mother. They don’t know it, but they are my world. My moon and stars!
So for me, to be “gypsy” is simply embracing and loving my free spirit, and to let it reflect on the world around me though the things I do. I have grown, and changed, and revisited many aspects of my life, going through the difficult process of culling. I have noticed patterns that I believe will continue to repeat unless they are changed. and like the song Gypsy, “..and it all comes down to you”. Indeed…